NEVER DIE

Based on the old joke, "Salesmen don't die, they simply go out of commission," here are a few I thought of:

Old librarians never die; they just go out of circulation.

Old alcoholics never die; they just lose their spirit.

Old gamblers never die; they simply cash in their chips.

Old workaholics never die; they just burn out.

Old contortionists never die; they simply become stiff.

Old contractors never die; they just expire.

Old race car drivers never die; they simply run out of gas.

Old constables never die; they simply lose their beat.